#1
While walking down the street one day a US senator is tragically hit by a truck and dies.

His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.

"Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in," says the man."

"Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity."

"Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the senator.

"I'm sorry, but we have our rules."

And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him.

Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people. They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and champagne.

Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that before he realizes it, it is time to go.

Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises...

The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him. "Now it's time to visit heaven."

So, 24 hours pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls roving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns.

"You've spent a day in hell and a day in heaven. Now choose your eternity."

The senator reflects for a minute, then he answers: "Well, I would ever have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I hink I would be better off in hell."

So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell.

Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage.

He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above.

The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder. I don't understand," stammers the senator. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and cavoar, we drank champange, danced and had a great time . Now, there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable."

"What happened?"

The devil looks at him, smiles and says "Yesterday, we were campaigning."

"Today you voted."


#2
This happened about a month ago just outside a little town in the low Country of South Carolina, and while it sounds like an Alfred Hitchcock tale - It's real.

This guy was on the side of the road hitchhiking on a real dark night in the middle of a thunder storm. Time passed slowly and no cars went by. It was raining so hard he could hardly see his hand in front of his face.

Suddenly he saw a car moving slowly, approching and appearing ghostlike in the rain. It slowly crept toward him and stopped. Wanting a ride real bad the guy jumped in the car and closed the door, only then did he realize that there was nobody behind the wheel. Then the car slowly started moving and the guy was terrified, too scared to think of jumping out and running.

The guy saw that the car was slowly approaching a sharp curve. Still too scared to jump out, he started to pray and begging for his life; he was sure the ghost car would go off the road and in the marsh and he would surely drown, when just before the curve, a hand appeared through the driver's window and turned the steering wheel, guiding the car safely around the bend.

Paralyzed with fear, the guy watched the hand reappear every time they reached a curve. Finally the guy, scared to near death, had all he could take and jumped out of the car and ran to town. Wet and in shock, he went into a bar and voice wavering, ordered two shots of whiskey, then told everybody about his supernatural experience.

A silence enveloped and everybody got goose bumps when they realized the guy was telling the truth and as not just some drunk.

About half an hour later two guys walked into the bar and one says to the other: "Look Bubba, There's that idiot who rode in our car when we was pushin it in the rain."

- these thoughts flowed through Jeff's fingers @ 4:49 PM