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Quarter Life Crisis

Thursday, November 30, 2006

El Monstero y Los Masked Avengers

It's getting to be that time of year agian. They are doing 4 shows this year with a larger budget which means more lazers, moving lights, and theatrics. Anyone interested in going again? Tickets are only $22 bones for nearly a 4 hour show!

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Joke Time


Two women friends had gone for a girl's night out; both were very faithful and loving wives, however, they had gotten over-enthusiastic on the Bacardi Breezers. Incredibly drunk & walking home they needed to pee, so they stopped in the cemetery.

One of them had nothing to wipe with so she thought she would take off her panties and use them. Her friend however was wearing a rather expensive pair of panties and did not want to ruin them, but was lucky enough to squat down next to a grave that had a wreath with a ribbon on it, so she proceeded to wipe with that. After the girls did their business they proceeded to go home.

The next day one of the women's husbands was concerned that his normally sweet and innocent wife was still in bed hung over, so he phoned the other husband and said," These girl nights have got to stop!

I'm starting to suspect the worst. My wife came home with no panties!
"That's nothing" said the other husband, "Mine came back with a card stuck to her ass that said:

From all of us at the Fire Station. We'll never forget you.


An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the husband passes gas and says, "Seven Points.".

His wife rolls over and says, "What in the world was that?".

The husband replied, "It's fart football.".

A few minutes later, his wife lets one go and says, "Touchdown, tie score.".

After about five minutes, the husband lets another one go and says, "Aha. I'm ahead 14 to 7.".

Not to be outdone, the wife rips out another one and says, "Touchdown, tie score.".

Five seconds go by and she lets out a little squeaker and says, "Field goal...I lead 17 to 14.".

Now the pressure is on the husband.

He refuses to get beaten by a woman, so he strains real hard.

Since defeat is totally unacceptable, he gives it everything he's got and accidentally poops in the bed.

The wife says, "What the hell was that?".

The husband says, "Halftime...switch sides."

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Wednesday, November 29, 2006

I'm A Lazy Blogger

In the past 3 months there are about 10 major events that I had intended to post about and probably should have but never got around to it. Granted, I've been busier than ever at work, been living at Karyn's house away from my computer, and have had plenty of stuff to keep me busy in the evenings (baseball playoffs, drinking, playing cards, etc). All of that is still no excuse. Coming soon look for me to work backwards in time and at least highlight or post some pictures about some of the following stuff:

  • The worst storm I've ever lived through
  • The John Mayer concert
  • My 10 year high school reunion
  • My giant October birthday party
  • The MLB playoffs and World Series
  • My playoff beard
  • Thanksgiving weekend

And here's a few things I'm considering posting about in the near future:

  • My big 2005 and 2006 music reviews
  • Posting my Christmas list so you can all buy me presents (Ha Ha, just kidding)
  • New Years at the Majestic??? (I'll have to talk to "The Meat" about this one first)

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Tuesday, November 14, 2006


I stumbled on this site called Skoopy the other day. A collection of hilarious and bizarre videos and photos from around the web. Most of the vids are already on Youtube or Google Video, but this cuts out some of the browsing for the funniest/coolest stuff.

Here's a few of my favorites:

Walking on water (or non-Newtonian fluid as the case may be)

The most bizarre exercise video ever

Massive explosions

Funny advertisement for a Women's Costume Store

Minivan hit by lighting

Hilarious fake toilet paper commercial

The coolest whiteboard ever

Christina Aguilera hitting the highest note I've ever heard a pop singer hit live. You'll have to fast forward to 1:59 and watch until 2:11. (No, I don't like her music but I do think she's hot and I can appreciate the fact that she has a great voice.)

Oh and here's Borat on SNL from a few weeks ago.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Smart Quiz

I don't know why, but for some reason when I copied this to my blog, the little icon moved from the Socially Smart area, to the Street Smart area. Oh well.

Socially Smart

As a socially smart person, you are best with others in real-life situations. This type of intelligence is closely linked to being 'street smart.' Theories and such are not much concern: the things that matter tend to be those which you can see, feel, touch - what you can really experience. This knowledge comes to you both out of a natural knowledge, as well as learning from the situations you find yourself in.

60% applied intelligence
20% natural intelligence

Take this quiz at

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